Thursday night was enjoyed with a Playboy girl.

I’m listening to the radio and I hear that there is a costume party at a club downtown. It’s a pimp and hoe costume party. To make it even better the club has a special guest, Playboy’s Miss January.

I do work in the adult industry so I am likely to know the same people Miss January does.

I grab my white dress shoes, white belt, black pants, black dress shirt, black tie, and a black Hugo Boss jacket I picked up at Value Village. I look like a professional pimp.

I slick my hair back with wax to go with the professional pimp look.

My dad is away in Vegas and he left the car.

I jump in at a little after 11 PM and arrive at the club around 11:30 PM.

There is a HUGE line.

I guess as soon as you mention “Playboy” there is a surge of interest.

I befriended the bouncers of the club in the summer so I bypass the line.

Things are bumping. There are LOTS of hoes, and a few pimps dressed to impress.

Miss January is way back in the VIP room.

She is swarmed by a bunch of guys who want to be known as THE guy that hooked up with a Playboy girl.

I am also interested in meeting Miss January. I decide to wait things out and mingle with the hoes.

The head bouncer, Edwin, comes by and we chitchat.

I ask if he’ll introduce me to the Playboy girl, he says, “Sure.”

Edwin separates the crowd as we make our way to the VIP area.

The VIP table is covered in glasses of cheap Champaign and strawberries covered in chocolate.

I open Miss January with, “Does this happen everywhere you go?” She makes a fake laugh. I respond to her fake laugh with, “Yeah, I know it sounded stupid, but I wanted to see if you had a sense of humour.”

I step over the edge of the table, and squeeze in beside Miss January. I look at Edwin and give him a wink. He laughs and leaves.

It’s obvious that Miss January hears Playboy related topics a lot. Just to open her up I mention a few adult industry related topics. This works.

I move away from adult related material and into personal material.

I researched her a bit before hand. You gotta love Wikipedia

I looked up where she lives (she lives about 30 minutes outside my city) and what other modeling she’s doing. I bring up topics related to what I discovered on Wikipedia. This hooks her and we click.

She’s paid to mingle with the crowd and I don’t want to tick off the club owner.

After 15 minutes I end our conversation by telling her I have to go. I give her my number and wish her a good evening.

Walking away from the VIP table I notice a difference in the crowd. The pimps appear jealous of me, and the hoes appear interested in me.

I have conversations with a couple of decent looking hoes, but my lack of interest keeps the conversations short.

I decide to leave the club, alone, and head to bed, alone.

Having a successful conversation with a Playboy girl is a double-edged sword; you’re on cloud nine but nothing else seems worth your while.